From The Beginning

Hello Non-Readers,

With senior year more than half way over I'm finding myself meeting more of my classmates or growing closer to ones I already know.  I often think "Wow, I wish I knew you sooner."  It is amazing how we often start to really care for other when we know our time with them is coming to the end.

So, I have an idea.  I am going to start completely caring for a person as soon as I meet them. This way when my time ends with them I know that I truly established a close bond with them.

Care always,

Courtney

So I'm doing amazingly well at updating. False.

As I talk to my fellow classmates about certain colleges requiring 3 - 4 essays I'm curious, is it necessary?  I also wonder how unequal it becomes when some students have their AP English teacher edit their papers while others edit it themselves.  When does it stop becoming the student's paper and becomes the teacher's?

I sometimes wish I could write using large words and flowing lines.

I sometimes wish I listened to music that wasn't mainstream.

I sometimes wish I had the confidence to wear clothes that would be fashionable in NYC but not Ohio.

I sometimes wish I could be happy with being size 2.

I sometimes wish I could control my Anxiety Disorder and people understood it.

But...

I love my pale skin.

I love my organizational skills.

I love that I have my best friend always with me.

I love how easily I cry while watching romantic comedies.

I love myself.

You And Your Beautiful Soul

For my summer Ap English project we have to read two books that regard to the view of Monsters. I choose to read The Wizard of Oz and Wicked. In Wicked the concept of souls are brought up often. This made me wonder -  does everything have a soul and what really is a soul?

Maybe a soul is a conscience that judges your actions. Or maybe, as a character in the book explains it, it is the allowance of a religious connection.

For me it is the passion that is in everyone.  The passion that inspires love and maybe even hate? But, the soul is supposed to be beautiful so how can something as awful of hate come out of it?

The second question is whether everything has souls. I believe every breathing creature does because when my dog is happy you can see it in her smile.

Obviously, I have not figured out the answers and I probably never will but I'm fine with that.

A Beginning

As I begin on this journey of blogging I wonder if I can keep it up, if anyone will read this (doubtful), if it is a waste of my time, or if I am interesting enough.

Facts:

I am a high school senior living in the fabulous state of Ohio.

I enjoy quirky movies but still love a good romantic comedy.

I like to believe I am arty and deep but this might not be the case.

Recently I was driving in the car.  As I cruised pass Burger King I took a second to look around. Sometimes we go so fast that we forget to stop. Look around. And see the beauty that is all around. If you really look a gasp because you wonder how you could of missed it. How you could of missed a place filled with mystery, frustration, and hope.

I am unsure if I will look back on my days when I am old and wrinkled and regret not living my life the way I should have - without regrets, without insecurity, and without worries.  Because how a child lives their life is perfect. They love every moment and are not worried about tomorrow, they are loving this day. Today.